Thursday, March 19, 2009

Senate and Media Call Out Bankers to Commit 'Hari Kari'

The press needs some 'good' stories. It's the code of honor...sepuku

Senate Concludes Not Enough Executive Suicide

Iowa City, IA – An Iowa Senator suggested that AIG executives should accept responsibility for the collapse of the insurance giant by resigning or killing themselves.

“Heck, if I screwed anything up, I’d do it,” said the Senator. “I mean, if I found out that the wars I voted for, or the trillions in wasteful budgets that I approved cost America it’s place in the world, why I’d do it in a heartbeat. Thankfully, my conscience is clean.”

“When will we return to the golden age of industry?” mused a House sub-committee on morally reprehensible ideas. “Back when the President of a bank loved his employees like a family and would throw himself out of a building when his business went under. These days executives either try to keep the company together by restructuring or take a golden parachute. Disgusting.”

The National Suicide Hotline set up a hotline for bank and insurance executives which “would by back all their holdings at one hundred a fifty percent”, “pay for three trips anywhere in the world to scout for a private retirement island” and “kill a few poor people, just so they know they’re still better than everyone else.”

“Yes! It’s a Republican!” shouted an AP Editor. “Quick! Throw this out on the feed and bump it every ten minutes. Finally we have some news, people!” After dabbing his brow with a handkerchief he added, “finally, some news.”

source: Calamity News

thanks to Strike the Root for the link

1 comment:

  1. How about the fact the vast majoriy of these stinking jews were involved in the 911 murders and here the kikes are again. Suicide, resign - - hang them and nuke israel.